Updates

I'm sorry I haven't written for a while. I was on the ABC diet until Thursday afternoon, when I had to go home half way through school because I felt extremely weak and I threw up water and everyone was like wtf. I lost 5lbs, but my health had declined so much I got scared and stopped the diet. I can't believe how shitty I felt after less than a week.

I feel super depressed now. I can't ever eat a normal 1200 calories like a normal person. I either eat very little and way too much. I feel like such a fat ass from these five days of grazing.  I don't ever want to look like every other american out here.  Plus, it's getting warm where I live (70 degrees D:) and I know I need to go spring shopping, but I'm just so disgusted with myself.

Calories never make me happy. I want to be hungry and be eating my perfect 500. I want it so bad. It truly makes me happy.  I just get so weak and sick.

Fuck you health. I'm getting skinny as hell, no matter what you say.

Yours truly,
Lynn

Fainted

I've had a set back of sorts. On Wednesday, I fainted at school and they took me to the hospital and stuff. The doctors said I was dehydrated and that because I didn't eat breakfast I fainted. I'm scared of that happening again, because my parents and teachers are watching me carefully and making sure I eat breakfast.  I'm hesitant to continue restricting, but I'm terrified of gaining weight.  The bottom line is I need to stop wishing and start doing.   Tomorrow I'm starting my new plan:

I'm doing the ABC diet, and a minimum of 30 minutes of exercise each day.

Also, I'm not sure if anyone actually is reading my blog, but if anyone is out there, do you know if under 18-year-olds can buy diet pills/laxatives?

Yours truly,

Lynn